Why is it that a young curvaceous woman is “categorised” as being FAT, with the inference she is out of control and if she will not bend to the manipulative control freaks in our media and fashion industries who want her to become what they say she HAS to become. Skinny.
Now don’t get me wrong. There are naturally skinny girls, and they are as natural as naturally curvy girls. Someone along the line, especially within the media, has been hoodwinked into believing (and surely they’re intelligent enough to work out what is real and what is not real!) that unless you’re thin then you’re not deserving of being recognised as “equal” in needs and wants. Being hoodwinked is one thing, trying to deceive all women into the same thinking is downright dangerous and discriminatory. But the women’s magazines particularly go on their merry way, pointing the finger and abusing women of their femininity.
Let’s look at Pierce Brosnan’s wife, Keeley Shaye Smith. Photos that appear in the press and on the internet show this couple is more interested in each other, than the photographer. In fact one would get the impression that Pierce Brosnan can’t keep his hands off his wife!
And Keeley Shaye Smith wears what she likes! Fashion gurus would shout and scream that a woman with curves such as Keeley Shaye Smith should never wear small sprig florals and two piece swimsuits - she thumbs her nose at them and wears what she chooses. She can be feminine and flirty, she can be conservative and professional.
Then of course there’s one of our favourites. Dawn French.
Candid photos used to show her as a normal next-door girl you’d be proud to know, while professional photography (a good makeup artist and photographer who knows how to make any woman glamorous) can present her like this.
Following her divorce at more than 20 years the wife of Lenny Henry, Dawn went on a diet and lost 8 stone. While claiming all it took was giving up chocolates and carbohydrates, the new Dawn certainly looks different and hopefully feels a lot happier - well she’s just recently married again and that’s a great way to start a new life.
Does Dawn French do what the fashion world and the media tell her to do? No, she has her own “style” and she makes a personal statement. Just like Keeley Shaye Smith.
We heard the the furore that surrounded the massive loss of weight/gain of weight of Kirsty Alley.
Women’s magazines, newspapers, television current affairs worldwide had a field day. The sad thing about this is that women everywhere bought the magazines, watched the current affairs, and lapped it all up. They nodded their heads and while munching a chocolate biscuit most likely said, fancy letting herself go! Honestly, women can be so cruel to each other. And they do it openly.
Oprah Winfrey is another “star” who see-saws around the weighing scale. One minute she berates herself for putting on weight, (the female audience all nod their heads in agreement) and the next she is parading on stage proudly announcing that she’s shed her weight again (the female audience again all nod their heads in agreement.)
Don’t these “stars” see what they’re doing? Not only to themselves but to the women who read about them, and watch their shows? They’re poking fun at themselves and laughing at themselves. Not kindly but harshly. And whether they know it or not, or whether they’ll admit it or not, they’re laughing at us. Because they know (that while they have the power and influence) that women everywhere will follow and do what they say.
Why can’t these women accept that their bodies are not meant to be extra thin. If they’re on the voluptuous side of things, then why not be proud of what they have? They, as well as many of us, can’t get passed the mentality that thin equals beauty equals healthy! It’s a fallacy. Big can equal beauty can equal healthy!
Inevitably we come back to the problem of knowing who we are and what we are, and having the right to choose how we live our lives. That includes how we dress.
If you’ve never been told “you shouldn’t wear that!” then you are indeed a fortunate woman. Most of us have been subjected to this sort of verbal abuse (and that’s what it is - abuse) based on other people’s ill-conceived and poorly conceived perspectives of what a woman should look like.
Why should I dress like my next door neighbour, who is 5 ft 10 and slim, or my grand-daughter who is 5 ft 2 and “in-between” or the masses who inhabit K Mart, Walmart, and Target stores (OK, I admit I buy clothing from these chain discount stores but I don’t necessarily wear the garment in the same way as a younger or older woman - I’ve learned to accessorise and do things with clothing!) My age, my life-style and my life-experiences won’t allow me to look like either my next-door neighbour or my grand-daughter and I don’t want to.
I’m an individual - I’m me, for goodness sake. I don’t want to look somebody else. Why waste time in trying to be a copy-cat when I have the opportunity of being me! I demand the right to know what I want and how I want to look. Don’t get me mixed with all the “celebrities” - so many of them are beginning to look the same to me anyway (maybe that’s because I’m growing a little older?)
‘Til next time.
©2013 R Parry-Brock, Australia