Tuesday, June 7, 2011


From Morgana de Courcy:

Why does it seem so hard to become disciplined when you become an online writer? I've been creating and writing newsletters and in-house magazines for the past 40 odd years (yes - I certainly don't look my age, do I?), yet coming to grips with writing a regular blog seems to present me with obstacles.

So today I decided. Drat it - I'll pretend I know what I'm doing, and if I fall flat on my face, well so be it! There's only one thing to do if that happens, and that's to stagger back up on my feet, stand tall and try again.

Big Issues have been at the forefront of news for a long time but are increasingly rearing their heads in many insidious ways. Over the airways, the television, the printed newspapers and the internet. Most if not all, the references are that to be acceptable in today's society, you have to be slim, trim, and beautiful. That's a nice wish, but real life isn't so clearcut.

Whether that beauty is allowed to be natural is another matter, because the inference is that you will never be beautiful enough and if you want to be noticed and treated as "one of us", then you'll have to have WLS, stomach banding, botox, liposuction and the works. Noone tells us the risks involved in all these procedures - and there are some horrific stories around.

But I decided a long while ago that I would turn a deaf ear to people who tell me I "MUST" do this or that, and "MUST NOT' do other things. Who gives them the right to tell me what to do and how to live my life? Especially as I believe, as a mature aged woman, I have insights into life and its experiences that give me the right to choose for myself. That's why I agreed (if a little hesitantly at first) to speak to women's groups. When accepting speaking engagements with women's health and safety organisations, teenage school children as well as groups catering to the elderly being encouraged to stay in their own homes as long as possible, I've been humbled by the fact that they've taught me much more than I've been able to tell them.

Low self-esteem is as rife as it has ever been. And that is very sad taking into account the fact that countless motivators, facilitators and counsellors have set up their own businesses, and many are sponsored with government as well as corporate funding, and yet as just as many people as ever present as having no confidence.

You can't force people to be confident. That builds up a defence mechanism that prevents them from growing independent, and from you gaining their trust and allowing you to offer strategies to help them. What I'm not talking about are not fancy and outlandish strategies - I'm talking about simple, small steps in a journey of discovery.

It comes down to choice. And we should all enjoy fredom of choice, not matter what aspect it relates to in our life. Choice made on sound principles; choice that becomes a matter of judgement based on analysing the pros and cons of situations, and of people. If we make a bad choice, then we are intelligent enough to realise we have to accept responsibility for its outcome. We can't blame anyone else.

Discipline comes into the picture. It always does. Whether it's how much time you spend cleaning the house; attending lectures; at your desk; with your family and friends; picking up after the kids; doing what you want and what you have to do, it all comes down to disciplining yourself. The result is always rewarding, no matter what area of your life we're talking about.

I don't agree that to be acceptable we have to be slim, trim, svelte and "beautiful". Digital enhancements are everywhere - we need to be real people in a real world. If we were all the same - looked the same, were the same size and shape, the same colour, the same age, how boring the world would be!

It's up to us. We are, after all, our own best asset! With a bit of discipline and a desire to be allowed to be who we are and what we are, we can show the world (and us for that matter) that weknow and we have made our choice!

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