Sunday, February 13, 2011

Feeling at a loss for words!

Self-confidence is a very important and essential part of one's life. I hear it said every day, and in fact I promote the whole idea within my interests including women's health.

But even I become lost for words, when I am questioned by someone who cannot, and it seems, does not want to understand the words I say, especially when I am questioned about my personal life and beliefs. I've learned over many years to be as precise and accurate as I possibly can be in what I say and the words I use, but there are still people who "assume" they know what I am going to answer, before they even form the question. This puts me at a disadvantage because they will not "hear" or even wait for my answer; in their opinion, and arrogance, they already "know".

In running seminars and short-courses I've been very aware and conscious that I must never be judgemental or assume that I know how everybody else "ticks". We are all different. Yet sometimes the English language does not allow us to be as precise as we would like to be, only due to the fact that each person's translation of what another person says, is totally different.

I'm one of those people who attempt to be literal and honest in my discussions and conversations. It is when I am queried time and time again, by people using different words in their questioning but all pivoting around and returning back to the same base question, that I find it becomes almost impossible to impress upon them that it is their translation which I find hard to fathom.

Having to justify one's own belief in oneself causes a great deal of stress. And it just shouldn't be. For if we lose sight of each person's personal dignity in believing in themselves and their principles, then we've lost all ability to show understanding, compassion and respect.

This places un-earned and un-deserving power in the hands of people who don't know us, but based on their own egos they experience some satisfaction in dismantling our self-confidence. This power can become a great weapon, and I believe, in my innocence, that they should be questioned as to what right they think they have to treat us in this fashion. This applies especially to people who either directly or indirectly have an impact upon our personal lives.

Self-confidence may take a long time in acquiring - it can just as easily within 30 seconds be completely destroyed by people who think they know everything and who don't take the time to study human nature and behaviour and the basic ethics and principles of being honest and true.

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