Springtime

Springtime officially began here in the eastern states of Australia on the 1st September.

Well!  You could have been mistaken about that, for the weather has been somewhat contradictory.  The cold spell we've had reminds us of mid-winter and this of course has reflected in what we are wearing.   It's almost as though we're asking ourselves "when will we be able to wear some of our lovely summer clothes".

But it's merely a matter of being patient, and making sure that our summer clothes are in readiness for us.  

For the more curvaceous woman, the ranges from Maggie T as well as Autograph meet our young-at-heart feelings - whatever age we are!   For the more budget conscious, then the ranges from Victoria Hill and Danart neet that need as well.   Visit both their websites and view their latest catalogues and then get along to a store or purchase from on-line.

Cotton and linen are favourites this year as well as a lot of stretch fabrics, particularly in pants and crops.   The casual but dressy look is one that will carry you from the home, or business, to an early evening get-together with friends.

NOT a problem to be solved!

I've just discovered this on FaceBook (but was unable to "share" for some reason) so full acknowledgement is given to the author/artist whoever it may be.

The important thing is that this is the type of "poster" we should see more often.   I wonder sometimes why we don't see many children's books about "chubby" boys and girls, in a positive way.

In fact why why don't we see a lot more curvaceous "female" heroines (or larger "male" heroes) in novels.  Can you think of any?  Write and share your finds.

A GLIMPSE OF THE SEASON'S TRENDS

I have to confess I was “giving up” on a number of the Australian suppliers for not having the courage (or initiative) to seriously look at the plus-size figure as something of beauty to be complimented and enhanced by loving clothing - rather than the run-of-the-mill sameness that has been appearing in our stores for far too long.

But size 22 plus women, want something that glides over the figure - yes, we still have a figure whether you believe it or not.   This is why I was so pleased to see the latest range from TS 12-24 Celebrate Your Curves.   

Taking Shape - the name says it all.  Now the brand is coming up with some great ideas for the woman whose size ranges between 12-24.  What a pity they don’t go into higher sizes!

This is a fabulous tunic/gown.  Called the White Noise Shirt Dress, it can be worn with leggings, slim pants, and if you have fabulous legs (like Maggie T) then black beautiful stockings.

With a button down front, this garment can be worn dressed-up or dressed-down, open or closed.  Large side splits at the sides allows for comfort, especially when sitting.  The cap sleeves (15cm) I would have preferred to be longer, but then if you like layering then a smart black sleeved cami or light tee shirt can disguise the thicker arms that many plus-size women experience.

I love the length of this garment and I also love what appears to be a collar.  Collars always seem to me to add a bit of class - don’t ask me why, but that’s my humble opinion.  

COLOURS AND HOW WE FEEL ABOUT OURSELVES

It’s all got to do with a basic knowledge of what colours suit you and your complexion.  Believe it or not but colours ARE important, not only to how you look but to how you feel.

Let’s face it, with everything that’s going on around us at any time, we need to feel “good” about ourselves.   There’s enough criticism and negativity that is inferred, or said, by others to make us feel less optimistic about ourselves.  That shouldn’t be, and we know we shouldn’t take any notice, but unfortunately there are days when we do.  And we fall in a heap.  We start criticising ourselves.  We vent our anger at ourselves for being too fat, too ungainly, too clumsy, too dull, too boring.  Then we become even more critical on how we dress.

If I turn my thoughts into focussing on “me” all the time, then I lose track of what is important to me, and in my life.  Many women I have spoken and listened to, who have all come to the conclusion that we know what is best for us, agree that when we have basic knowledge of what is good for us, then we can add to it, work on it, and enhance it.  Thus making our lives happier and contented.

When I was younger I wasn’t aware there were most definitely colours that didn’t suit me.  I saw lovely garments in the stores, I went in, tried them on in the store dressing rooms and handed over my hard earned money for them.  Taking them home and hanging them in the wardrobe, it simply didn’t occur to me to ask myself why, after something like 5 years, I had never worn that garment again.  I learned much later it was because the colours did not suit me.  The lighting in the dressing rooms of the stores and my hunger to find something I liked made me lost focus.

That was until I met Susan M of Booragoon, WA.  An Image Consultant par excellence.  Susan took me through the steps of understanding the range of colours and the importance of yellow based and blue based colours.  Now for a long while I couldn’t understand what a “blue based yellow” was, nor a “yellow based blue”.   It took time, and I’m glad it did because now when I see a colour I know immediately what category it falls under.   I’m a “blue based person” so when I go into a store I know exactly what I’m looking for.  My wardrobe is grateful for this knowledge too.

It all comes down to being willing to learn new things about ourselves, and life.

THE FUN of BEING PLUMP

More than 50 odd years ago, an artist by the name of Duane Bryers in America, created a cheeky redhead.  He named her Hilda (to many these days an old-fashioned word that would describe a staid, matronly, even bitter thin-lipped woman).  However the more you see of these pictures of Hilda, the more the name Hilda seems to fit her.

(I don't know what Duana Bryers named this partcular picture, but I thought "Satisfaction" neatly says it all!)

But it’s not the name Hilda that is so pertinent to my post today.  It’s her figure - her shape - her roundness - her plumpness.   More than that it is her cheekiness, her fun and carefree attitude.   She takes life as it is, and laughs her way through it.

You know I’ve been around a fair while, and I had never heard of Duana Bryers and I’d certainly never heard of Hilda. Perhaps it is because she is part of American history and unless we had the privilege of purchasing calendars from the States in years gone by, there was no reason why we should have known Hilda.  But I found her yesterday and I believe she dispays ALL the attributes that a plus-size “pin-up” girl needs.   

For one major question stands out to me: 

where during the past 50 years did our self-acceptance, 

our sense of fun at life and living,

our carefree sense of being completely at ease with our own self, 

disappear to?    

Did life become far too serious, far too responsible, far too hard and difficult, that we forgot how to be HAPPY?   

Let’s enjoy the simple pleasures of life.   Being plump and having plenty of curves is something to admire and something to celebrate.   Remember too that age has nothing to do with self-acceptance - you can never be too young or too old.

HURTING ....

"THE FIRST STEP IN NOT HURTING OTHERS

 IS TO STOP HURTING YOURSELF"

WAITING UNTIL .....

You've probably heard someone say they'll wait until ....... before they'll do this, that or the other.  In fact if we're honest most of us have said the same thing.  I know I did, especially as it relates to losing weight.   And over the years I've heard thousands of women say the same thing.

"I'll wait until I lose weight .... before I travel overseas",   "..... before I do that course at University",  "..... before I'll buy that gorgeous red taffeta dress"; "....... before I'll start going out";  "...... before I'll find a man who is attracted to me".' "....... before I'll buy a swimsuit";  "...... before I'll join some friends for coffee";  "before I'll have a baby".     And so it goes.

Look at it this way.   Why do we wait?   Why should we wait?   Because if we look at the situation fairly and squarely, we'll see that we're setting ourselves up for a "what if we don't lose the weight" scenerio, and what happens then?  We become embittered and despair of ever being happy.

We go without the things that we would dearly love to achieve in the meantime, and who's to say that the opportunity to do what we wish for will still be there should we happen to lose that weight?   We may be successful in losing the weight and then find to our dismay that we don't or can't do what we dearly wanted.

On the other hand, I say (and OK this has been learned over many decades and through many episodes of self-doubt) go ahead and do these things NOW.   Putting things off never achieved anything really substantial in the long run.   Travel overseas - do that course - buy that dress and swimsuit - go out and meet up with friends - and if you and your partner are determined try for a baby.  And there's no reason why you shouldn't find a man who finds you attractive - it happens all the time - you just don't hear about all the success stories!

Don't put things off.   Too many stories are told of people who missed out on so much just because they put things off "until they lost weight ......".

Losing weight is not the answer to any of our self-doubts;  confidence has to be fought and won by our own determination and strength (with a little help from our friends of course).   Confidence in our self,  our abilities and our potential is not dependent upon our weight (or our losing weight). 

We're intelligent, articulate women.  Yet sometimes we fall into the trap of telling ourselves (over and over again) that it is the weight that holds us back from fulfilling our dreams.  Not so.   It is allowing the negative thoughts to take control and to manipulate our thoughts and emotions that are the trouble - dispense with the negative thoughts and replace them with "I can".   Try it out.  And have fun doing it, without waiting until!

(And if you can't find a red taffeta dress or swimsuit that suits you, then find yourself a dressmaker who will take on the job of making you look stunning.  It will be well worth it.  As far as a flattering swimsuit is concerned, have a look at Monif C's and Igigi's websites in the US - their suits are absolutely incredible!) 

© R P-B, 2013   

SOMETHING to MAKE you SMILE!

Cartoons so often capture what we think.  They make us laugh.   How about this one?  And don't we all agree that we are "CLASSY LAZY"?

(Full acknowledgement to the creator of Garfield).

TALK ABOUT the WEATHER!

Living in Melbourne does bring with it a great sense of never quite knowing what the weather is going to be on any one day.  In fact it's more like never knowing what it will be hour to hour!

Of course the climate of any city reflects on what we wear.  Or should I say what the suppliers and retailers "DECIDE" we should wear.   Me, I'm a great believer in layering during the cooler months and I've been known to wear summery garments on the colder of days - I can get away with it because I'm confident in what I'm wearing and what I'm doing!

While there is talk about climate change and global warming, and we all know that this is occurring and has been so since the dawn of time, the effect of weather patterns changing in the here and now mean  we need to adapt constantly.  So instead of bemoaning the weather,  it's good sense to focus on things that we have a little control over, and that comes back to what we wear.

Here in Melbourne there is a lull in what the stores are telling us is "fashion".   I'm not sure about the exclusive boutiques, but the stores that sell to women like you and me, have become boring and uninteresting - AGAIN.   It goes in cycles.   Everything looks the same from one outlet to another, while the fabric - what can I say?   Our grandmothers used to say this sort of fabric was only good for washing the floors!  Am I being too critical?   No, I don't think so.   The fabrics on sale are not good quality, regardless of the cost the retailers have on the garments.   But people buy, and the reason women buy in the majority of cases is simply this.  They need something to wear, and while what is on offer through the stores is not GREAT, they'll buy because there's not much else to choose from.  What really confuses me is that the poorer the quality fabric or garment, the higher the price seems to be.   Spending hundreds of dollars on a garment that are more "trendy" than practical doesn't make sense.  (Unless you have plenty of money in the bank!)

So what started me on this?   I found a beautiful garment from the USA that I think epitomises "style" for the plus size woman.   While my favourite colour is red (other than black and white and I know there are people who say B&W are not colours but I'll not go into that at the moment), this garment is a beautiful coral colour. (Well, coral is a shade or two below red isn't it?)

The cut, the design and the styling of this dress is lovely.   The neckline which is between Vneck and sweetheart, and the wrap around waistline enhances the body.

Flowing, fluid, flattering.

What do you think?

an ADDITION to GRACE any WARDROBE

Incredible as it may seem, the Little Black Dress (or LBD) is not only flattering for our slim, trim, svelte sisters, but with clever design work, it is flattering for the woman with curves.

Again it's IGIGI who come up trumps when it comes to styles that compliment the female form, and create the scene for high self image.  Knowing that you can look good, can lead you to feeling good.  In this day and age, that is an ideal we all aim for.

This is Igigi's Paola dress.   A basic black, with delicate lace.  Dress it up with your diamonds and or pearls.  Keep it classic with some drop earrings and a smart clutch.

LATEST STYLE STATEMENT!

Give credit where it's due - is an old saying, that is as true today as back when.    And all credit to Monif C of the USA.

Monif C comes up with some great designs and the Fiona Dress is a dress that says to the world - look at me.  

Monif C's writeup for this dress states it has just arrived for spring!  Well, we're in Autumn over here, but this dress would do fine for any occasion in our season and would be as much a hit here as in the USA.

What I love about this dress is its "return to the 50's" look in the front zip, but Monif C has combined another look from that era, by adding a peplum.  So feminine, so flirty.

The fabric in this dress is luxe ottoman which Monif C claims "glides over your curves".  Wow!

Look chic, tailored and sexy in this new design.

"IMAGE" versus "SELF-IMAGE"

Elizabeth Taylor, remembered as an actress, a beautiful woman and a "screen-star" was heard to say when she was asked what it felt like being known as an ICON:

"I am NOT an icon.  I am an actress.  

An icon is a religious painting 

or figure used as an aid to devotion in Eastern churches."

Yet it's when Elizabeth Taylor writes intimately about herself, and there are a number of books, it becomes obvious that this woman had a greater depth of understanding of women's feelings and needs, than she was given credit for.   Too many saw her as just being a beautiful woman without much other substance; but I would like to quote her as follows:

"One of the dangers of growing up in Hollywood * is that people tend to confuse "image" with "self-image".  How you look and what you feel about yourself are often not the same.  Image refers to our appearance.  Self-image deals with who we really are.

We all know heavy people whose emotional lives are in good order who have an excellent sense of self-worth.  And Hollywood is filled with thin beautiful women who are unhappy and unfulfilled, with little sense of self-esteem."

She then goes on:   "Feelings of self-worth will naturally be affected in part by outside opinion - by friends, family and other loved ones.  Still, in the end, self-image is forged in the core of our own personality.  Every woman knows how mood can affect the way she thinks she looks.  And every woman who is honest enough will admit that self-image and self-esteem are inextricably intertwined.  Please note - I didn't say "image" but "self-image".  Looks alone are not the determining factor."

(Editor:  and I would say anywhere - not only Hollywood!)

This is an excerpt from the Prologue of "Elizabeth Takes Off on Weight Gain, Weight Loss, Self-Image and Self-Esteem" by Elizabeth Taylor, written in 1987.    It is as pertinent today as it was when it was written.

This is not a book on "Diets" per se, but more importantly aspects of feelings and emotions of a person who is seen to be heavier or larger than she is expected to be.   I found her words very compelling at times.

A PERSONAL "CAN DO" LIST

1. I will let go of "negative" labels, such as lazy or bad or clumsy, that I have used to describe myself these long years, recognising that labels are inaccurate and destructive and that they stifle growth.

2. I will nurture myself by giving approving, reassuring messages to myself about me. I will be a friend to myself and offer myself the same understand I would offer to another in my place

3. I will release others from the responsibility of making me happy. I take the initiative to get what I need rather than waiting and hoping that somehow what I need will be brought to me by someone else.

4. I will share the vulnerable parts of myself with those I love.

5. I choose to be happy NOW - to celebrate all the small pleasures of life as they occur - instead of putting happiness off until I lose weight, get married (or divorced), make my first million, move house and so on.

6. I will expect that I will incur the disapproval of others. I recognise there is no way I can please all the people all the time.

7. I realise that some of my greatest learning has come from the mistakes I have made.

8. I embrace the position that I am an intrinsically valuable human being. I am a worthy person simply because I am.

......© 1991-2013 RoseMarys NoteBook - Australia. (By permission of the author.)

BLACK is the "NEW" BLACK

Seems that no matter what colour scheme sets the trend for any season, that black is THE major source of inspiration.

This is again proven by the beautiful range of plus-size garments from Igigi - USA.

Their "GENEVIEVE" DRESS says it all.   (Read their blurb.)

Spritz of sequins brings just the right amount of shine to this faux wrap silhouette. This dress is cut to enhance and define curves with its flattering ruching at the side seams. Complement the shine with a silver metallic pump and art deco gems for some on-trend flare.

Designed and made in San Francisco, USA

Color: Black/Silver
Material: Poly/Elastane

Don't put life on hold, or wait until ........

We human beings are simply amazing.   Think about it - even if we are hindered by constraints, we can become the person we were meant to be, simply by believing and doing what we can to make that possible.   We can go anywhere we want - even if it is sitting in an armchair watching a travel documentary.   We can be a friend to someone we have yet to meet as well as caring and giving to those we have the privilege of knowing and calling our "friends".   We can receive love, and we can give love.  Unconditionally.

So it saddens me somewhat when I hear women say to me, "I don't know how to be happy."  Are they really speaking about happiness which is, after all, very difficult to describe and may only be fleeting, or do they mean a feeling of complete confidence in themselves and their lives (whatever circumstances they may find themselves in) which is often translated as "joy"?  I ask because I speak from personal experience in that I have known times and moments of happiness, which is not a state of permanence, whereas inner joy is.

Now, both you and I know there many things that occur in our lives that can burden us; that can inhibit us; that can hold us back; and that can limit our feelings of adequacy and worth.   Those of us who have managed to work through some (or even all) of those feelings know what it's like.   And the best advice we can give to those who are still endeavouring to "discover" themselves?  

1. To live in the NOW, and 
2.  LOVE yourself (in order that you may be able to love others, unconditionally), and
3.  LAUGH as often as you can, and as often as you like.   (Isn't there an old saying, that "laughter is the best medicine"?)
4.  Surround yourself with beautiful things (and beautiful people - and we're ALL beautiful, you know) as well as lovely music.

Give yourself constant healthy and happy self-talk.   Read "positive" publications that reinforce your feelings of self-worth.  As often as possible.   Discard thoughts of not being good enough;  "you're not worth it";  "you'll never succeed";  "you're a waste of space" and similar comments made to us by ourselves and people who should be encouragers but who gain some delight in putting us down all the time.   Seriously think about those people and whether you shouldn't perhaps have less to do with them - even if they are family members - because no matter how much you adapt to meet their expectations and demands, you'll never meet their unrealistic ideals. And why should you bother?   Much better to set your own personal goals, and as you reach each of those goals, to set your sights higher and wider - for your own personal achievement and satisfaction, not for theirs.

Don't have regrets - all of us have disappointments, but there's no need to dwell on them.   They are a part of life, and life is to be lived to the fullest.   Life, love and laughter is what it's all about.  Here and now!

 “Yesterday is gone. Tomorrow has not yet come. 

We have only today. Let us begin.” 

― Mother Teresa

“When you arise in the morning 

think of what a privilege it is

 to be alive, to think, to enjoy, to love ...” 

― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

One jacket

I can no longer count the number of times someone says to me, I can't see how I can wear one garment other than the way I always wear it.

So to those who think one garment only has one part to play in her wardrobe, here's an example of one jacket, worn slightly differently in three ways, all with the clever use of accessories to highlight it.

Now just think of how many other ways you could wear this same jacket.   A black pencil thin skirt; a slightly flared skirt; chocolate brown pants; black or chocolate brown cargoes,  knee length shorts;  white pants in different lengths; then why not terracotta red pants; skirts; belts;  bags etc.?

Different hats, handbags, belts and shoes not to mention different ear-rings and bangles and necklets, and even scarves, will always compliment a single garment like this, and expand your wardrobe into many areas to meet the requirements of your life-style.   Casual, conservative, semi formal - you name it.  

Now do you get the idea?

Curvaceous, feminine and flirty!

The young curvaceous woman has everything going for her.  That includes some gorgeous fashion.   The local City Chic group has some lovely garments at the moment, and if you're in the mood for parties then you can't miss out on something like this - their Eyelash Frill Dress. - up to size XXL (size 24).   Why not even get in early for your Christmas dress?  You'll "light" up more than just a mere room!

City Chic's writeup is as follows:  "Look and feel beautiful in this Eyelash Frill Dress.  This soft and floaty woven style flows beautifully and features gorgeous frills with an eyelash hem, a boned bodice with shirring on sides,  adjustable straps, invisible zip closure and is fully lined."

Australian fashion for the plus-sizer

I'm always on the look out for Australian designed and/or made clothing for women.  Especially for the plus-sizer.

I've just had a look again at the Zebart site and found some nice garments which will compliment any women's wardrobe.

See if you agree.

Accessories - Scarfs

For many plus sizers, buying new clothes becomes a bit hard, especially if the budget is tight!   This is where accessories come into their own, and it doesn't take much to extend your wardrobe simply by adding accessories that attract the eye!

While most plus sizers have found a basic colour scheme to build upon, there are times when bright, vivid colour is needed to uplift not only the outfit but also one's confidence.

Like so many women I love scarves - I have quite a collection I've got to admit.   And while I have my favourites, I'm always willing to learn new and exciting ways of wearing them.

I came across this YounTube video from Coldwater Creek, and I'd encourage you to watch it.   It brings out the "creativity" side of me, and I've no doubt it will do the same to you too.

Watch and enjoy.

Thick/thin Models

Plus sizers are constantly told that their figures are hard to design for.   Well, I have a similar thought when it comes to really thin women.  

This photo shows a model wearing pants that appear to be so tight that she can't stand with her legs together.  Don't tell me that models and women per se don't prefer to stand with their legs together.   So many models and so-called celebrities stand like little children caught out doing something naughty - where did that stance come from?

Why isn't it OK for a woman to have flesh on her arms and legs?   This photo to my way of thinking looks ungainly.  But then I might be old-fashioned!